Um...
I can't find it. ^_^

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http://www.geocities.com/tatewaki_42/ - The Cyberwizards Realm http://elfwood.lysator.liu.se/loth/c/r/cruz19/ - My Elfwood Gallery

..would you please join me in prayer..

Dear Lord,
Please strike 50megs server dead..
amen

ok, I moved te file again to here...
thi one will work!!

http://members.truevine.net/jcgospel/Twz.zip

tell me what you think!!

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...Mountain...Dew......Do...The...Dew...

Well, I downloaded a broken zip file. It may be broken on your site, or Getright ruined my download. I'll try downloading it again tomorrow.

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http://www.geocities.com/tatewaki_42/ - The Cyberwizards Realm http://elfwood.lysator.liu.se/loth/c/r/cruz19/ - My Elfwood Gallery

Well, JF, I got a download of TWZ without problem, and, having played it a bit, I think I'm ready with some comments/suggestions/barbed jabs at your ego, and yes, I'm going to be nitpicky because you can afford it if you want a good game. Read it! It's taken me hours to record all this. (Anything to help a budding game maker) To wit, here's 36 suggestions I wrote down while playing: (in semi-chronological order)

1) Some of the opening title images are not quite the same size as the screen and allow the remains of the image behind to show. Just a technical note, but it's noticeable.
2) I like the Mystery Line. ;-)
3) The first two title shots are awesome. I love the color shifts and whatnot. Very unique, too.
4) Ripping scenes from commercial games: frowned upon. Ripping scenes from different commercial games: bad idea design-wise. It's distracting, especially to those who recognize them.
5) "Some one" is one word.
6) Nice music in the opening.
7) Subtitles over static scenes. Not the most unique idea, but it's functional. It sort of grows on you the more you see it.
8) The scenes usually fit the words very well if you ignore where they came from. That is to say, I can just see Steiner being a thug freeing me from prison.
9) Use periods, please.
10) Don't change text colors in the middle of an image. I missed the last part of the second frame the first half-dozen times I read it.
11) Similarly, don't change font sizes in the middle of the opening. It breaks the player's absorption into the game.
12) Nice fonts on the images.
13) Capital letters do Not belong In the middle of Scentences.
14) You have some general grammar mistakes throughout, like were instead of would.
15) "Making you an aspect of escape"? That's sounds like a translation from Japanese worthy of the famous SNK translators themselves. (and they sounded rike Yoda on dlugs when they wele having a good day) Just what did you mean, anyway?
16) The plot gets sketchy around the part where it's all text on a blue background. I feel like there's a whole scene missing after the word "Quarini".
17) Nice names, by the way.
18) Lightyears measures distance, not time! Haven't you ever played Pokémon?!?
19) Always use the elipsis (...) when a scentence extends beyond the page end. You did it sometimes, but not others.
20) Which brings up another point: Be consistent! Make everything in any given unit of a uniform style.
21) Everything starting with "Help the scientists" seems rushed, as if it were some big muddle. What are we supposed to warn them about? How can we overthrow something that doesn't exist yet? What scientists are you talking about? You never mentioned them before.
22) Negatives of images=bad idea.
23) Waiting for those monochrome clones to wander aimlessly off the screen was boring. It'd be better to have them briskly march by.
24) What's with the bat-monkey-thing? Nice animation on it, though.
25) Have characters face each other when they talk.
26) I like the idea of having different windows for each character. It could get distracting, but then again it might not.
27) Why do I lose HP for using the stairs?!?
28) Did I mention that your punctuation needs a bit of work.
29) The little medieval boy seems to speak in a bit too modern a style...
30) "making his armies un-organization"?!? I think you just topped SNK with that one...
31) There are a lot of overused words in your text, like "big" and "great". If you can get a thesauras, try using that to find other words.
32) Seriously, a lot of the text after the guards leave sounds like a really, really bad translation from another language. It swaps nouns and verbs and adjectives (oh my!) like crazy.
33)The second room is WAY too big. It should probably be re-organized.
34)Why are there buildings within buildings? The layout makes no sense, as if walls are missing. What's with the inn stuff out in the unprotected?
35)If I recall, it's highly frowned upon to steal graphics from another game. *cough*
36) If you add all the story suggestions I made above, the opening could get monotonous. Consider letting the player play through a scene, maybe the escape, to involve them early. This will also allow for further plot development without pages of text.

Um, at that point I found nowhere to go... I hope you can make good use of these suggestions. I didn't mean to sound harsh, but if one does not strive for perfection one will not even come close. Onward, and godspeed!

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--ßruceKid

"Use of funny quotes is mandatory in this state."

Approx in about 15:00 minutes from THIS post, I will be uploading The Demo 3.0 It has the following.

a. fixed Grammar.

b. New Intro.

c. Smaller zip size.

ALSO

I did not steal any art as in VSP, or CHRs, OR SONGS.
everything in this new Demo is Legal. Not to mention a few new things..

NIKKO
1: I tried to fix as much As i could..

the falling down the stairs part was just to show the Feature. Remember this is a DEMO!

I know of the following bugs..

overHp.
- Money.
The building within a building.


I plan to fix the above in the Demo 3.5

....

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...Mountain...Dew......Do...The...Dew...

OK, now let's stay calm. I wasn't implying you were doing anything illegal, just that it was considered bad taste. I understand that some corners have to be cut for the sake of time when making a demo. I was just pointing out anything and everything I could think of to change in the demo. My apologies if I offended you in some way. I'll go download the new demo and see wazzup now, OK? All happy smiles! :-)

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--ßruceKid

"When time run out, very dangelous monster appear. Best to push in many quarters of money."

Hazzah JesusFreak,
hee hee, you never show face on my board anymore :-(
I told everyone there to be nice, but did they listen?
No.

Ok, I am uplaoding your demo right now, I am going to play alittle today, and alittle tomarrow, and such.
Then I am going to review it, it sounds like an all around good game seeing as it is your first game release.

I am also trying to get people to post their reviews of video games on my site, that will allow me to update it more often.

Well, its done downloading, so I'm going to go play it now.

-KarmaCult
"Instant Lunch.... Yummy"

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Woop Woop, Tanka Tanka, CHOOO CHOOO!