It's that time again, kiddos! Tim to see how the gruedorf challengers are holding up!
We have two new Johnny-come-latelys: Toen and Erayman. Everyone give them a round of applause for the stones to join an unwinnable battle, and condolences for their imminent demise at the hands of their betters!
We also have one Johnny-go-awayey: the indominatble John "Ustor" Weng has joined us in our little band of dysfunctional brothers. His new 
wundermint.com not only features an umlauted minty 'U', but a dire assortment of completed games only comparable to SD Hawk's... and on the whole prettier than those.
The competition stiffens like undersexed freshmen at Mardi Gras. I'm not too worried, though... I'm sure to vanquish you all, etc., etc...
The Motley Roster
The Progress Report
Code: The Zodiac Cogency
The Zodiac Cogency has been in good upkeep, with Code making good on the "7 days or else" ultimatum. Not only has he been a sport with making some neat strides in his battle system, he currently holds first place in regards to
nicest display of boobies in a gruedorf game (...even if they are potentially ripped boobies). Code is totally not a loser. Yet.
Code, having posted today, has until the 11/25 to make his next update as of this writing.
Erayman: Armor Factory
Erayman's a long time lurker, first time demo poster! Ha-ha, gruedorf is WORKING!
Ahem.
Erayman's first effort is a nice one. He's got a little map workout out of a very nice tileset (made for the public by age-old VERGEr and artist extraordinaire Hyptosis.
The demo also features the beginnings of a battle system and a map system, and Erayman shows some amount of dedication here. We shall have to keep our eyes on him, fellow fiends and villains.
Unfortunatly, Erayman is tip-toeing preposterously close to the edge of the 7-day-limit-of-losing as of this update. Will he manage to escape the pains of loss? Tune in next time! (how dramatic!)
Falthorn: The (absent) Sidescroller
Speaking of loss... Notice the lack of an update picture? This isn't due to a text-only update. This is due to no updates.
At all.
On his whole blog!
For over two weeks!
I'd suspect both Falthorn and the enigmatic "Thunderpudd" had died, but for the fact that I talked to Falthorn on the telephone but last night.
Falthorn is a loser and has been in a constant state of disgrace since 11/5. I hear his family has disowned him and sold all of his meager belongings.
Kildorf: Geas
My arch-nemesis saw that in the post previous to the current one I claimed to've done a light amount of work. Whereas I did several hours of map editing, here's, in his own words, what he added for this update.
"Basically, this version adds a frames-per-second counter, and has the neat feature that if you hit "A" then it crashes."
-Seamus Peveril, Neo-Renaissance Man
With competition like this, it's truly a wonder I don't slit my wrists out of shame from merely drawing comparison.
If one considers this "post" legitimate, Mister Kildorf has until 11/21 as of this writing to stop sucking, lest he be branded with the firey iron of loserdom.
McGrue: The Astrad
While boasting earlier this week that I'd be making an amazing, mindblowing, panty-disintegratingly-cool post any day now, I blatantly defied myself in.... not doing so!
Instead I spent time cleaning up the map that I am going to demonstrate the nigh-disgusting amounts of awesome upon. No, really. You have been warned.
If someone else ever cared to take the time to work up a news post like this, this here would be a great opportunity to mock me to little pieces. However, since I'm the one spending a few hours of my precious time writing this summary, I'm declaring myself super-awesome and quite handsome to boot. Take that!
McGrue has not lost to date, and will continue to never lose... as long as he posts again before or on 11/25.
Overkill: Signal
After being mercilessly taunted, teased, poked, prodded, and mocked by all the other reindeer in
#verge about his
Sucktastic Loser status from earlier,
Mr. Crowell decided to dust off, get back on the horse and attempt to stop sucking.
Unfortunatly, Andrew's idea of "stop sucking" is "do as little work as possible in a week", as his entire update consisted of loading pre-existing artwork and displaying it. No, really, that's it!
I mean, at least Kildorf had the good sense to bind the 'A' key to application armegeddon.
Overkill has lost once before, and is currently Technically Not Losing until 11/25 as of this writing.
Rysen: Amethyst
Rysen's update is yet another unimpressive, sad sack of a post. Here, hear the man himself describe his doings:
"So Greg’s sleep is now in, there’s a fancy attack animation for it, and it will prevent an enemy from attacking for such amount of time. It’ll also break after you use a regular attack….I meant to add this for magic attacks as well, but forgot. :D"
"Still no visual representation of it, as I’m still trying to figure out how I’m gonna do that."
Really, guys, come on. Pics or it didn't happen. Shameful.
Rysen apparently hasn't lost yet, but I'm sure he doesn't sleep well at night with work like this. Also his mother told me she doesn't actually love him. Honest. Rysen has until 11/23 to make a post before he enters the Hall of Losedom.
SDHawk: Contrivia
Crikes. SDHawk continues to "design" his "game" and pretends that these "words" constitute "work". The nerve.
Read his many new words here in google docs. Or don't. Because TL;DR.
I'm not going to bring up any irony in citing "tl;dr" in this post if you don't... <_<
SDHawk has until 11/21 to cough up more work before he's considered a big fat loser.
Syn: Soul of the Machine
Clearly misinterpreting the
cheers of his enemies that he was about to fail, Syn decided to rally and post... a new technicolor sink!
Frankly, I should interpret this as an act of war.
Syn hasn't lost yet, but he *is* french canadian. So that's funny. Syn has until 11/21 to make another brightly colored appliance or face terrible mocking at the hands of the Loser Notification Execution Squad.
Thrasher: Vulture
In a mind-boggling attempt to use some deranged reverse-psychology on me, Thrasher is attempting to claim he's lost when my google reader says he hasn't. He was close, though. If he really wanted to lose he should've waited a few more hours.
Anyways, he's made a 3d thing using a 3d lib and default 3d parts. Apparently it's gonna be a tactical RPG involving ROBITS! Isn't that EXCITING?
Thrasher may or may not have lost before, and he may or may not be a loser now. He's bewildered me to my very core. Either way, he has until 11/19 to break his silence on his blog before he's definitly, definitly a loser again (or maybe not again).
Toen: Stick Ninja
Long time verger and indie posterboy Toen has decided to come out of a retirement to kick it with a new game and a new alcoholic binge! I'll let him use his own words here.
"A NEW KIND OF HERO. FOR A NEW KIND OF BITTER ARCH-NEMESIS RIVALRY.
"Featuring a KILLER SOUNDTRACK by whoever I feel like sticking into it with a flagrant disregard for copyright law, MINDBLOWING graphics by me and the size 9 Photoshop brush, and STUPEFYING rendering speeds brought to you by Master Gambrell's CAROT ENGINE.
So, we're finally getting the gun-toting, hookshot-firing stick-figure action gamers have cried out to the heavens for ages to recieve. Where a cold, unfeeling god did not deliver, Jeff "Toen" Hutchins will.
This one will truly test the Tychoian gameplay-over-pretty hypothesis. Assuming, that is, that there's good gameplay.
Toen has until 11/21 to pull more sticks out of his ass before he is branded He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Win'd.
Ustor: ???
And finally, our new dark horse candidate. I actually know a bit about this entry and am excited to see it. And that's not just because it may or may not involve more boobs than The Zodiac Cogency.
The hypothetical boobs don't hurt, though.
Apart from coding his website from scratch using cakePHP (and the first time he's used PHP), he's done little but declare his intent to rock our collective socks off. Fiend, Fearmonger, or Fraud: You be the judge.
Ustor has until 11/23 to produce something of sustance before he will be baked. And then there will be Loser Cake.
And that's it!
Falthorn's currently the only loser! HEY FALTHORN STOP LOSING!
Well done everyone... and less well done to those of you who barely did anything. We'll meet again in a week or two with a new report. Until then, let's see some more noise on those forums, people. ;)
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http://bananattack.com/blog/
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http://stellarx.org/sdhawk/contrivia/
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